Devotion…
So, have you had a Fuze beverage? I’m just checking, because every once in awhile, I bump into someone that has yet to discover the magic that is Fuze. Made from delicious fruit juices in delightful combinations like “Dragonfruit Kiwi” and “Mango Mellon,” these drinks promise to keep you alert, slenderized and energetic. I’m not sure if they deliver on all of these fronts, but I can tell you that a bottle typically packs a day worth of vegetable nutrients and serves pretty well as a lunch replacement if you juts can’t leave your desk. They also have the amazing ability to stay delicious even when warm, clearly showing they are intended for the poor cube drone. So spectacular are these treats that Kim and I used to split them as a work day pick me up several times a week – and this would often become the sincere highlight of our days.
Well, recently I introduced Lindsie to the glory and splendor of Fuze. She, of course, was smitten and professed her love for the liquid manna to me today. Being that it’s a very slow week for office workers everywhere, we crafted this fan letter and submitted it moments ago:
Dear Fuze People,
We love everything you stand for: you make our day complete and what’s more, you complete our lives. Your delicious beverages are there for us each morning, cold and refreshing. Even better, after a long day of office slavery, your magical liquid is still tasty as ever when again our lips meet back at the cubicle.
In short, Fuze may be the single best drinking product we’ve ever stumbled upon in our grocer’s refrigerated section. And for that, we owe you a undying debt of gratitude.
Tearfully,
Nick & Lindsie
I received an automated “we’re reviewing your letter” reply. We shall see if anything more comes of this. Hopefully it will be better received than my letter to Bravo asking why Tim Gunn’s Guide to Style adverts have a bunny playing the drums looming behind everyone’s favorite stylist for no apparent reason. I’m sure that was filed straight away into the “complete nutter” bin… I needed to know, though!
Bravo, I’d still like to know. What gives with the bunny?